As far as I’m concerned, either you are dining at a kid-friendly restaurant or you’re not. There is no middle ground.

I don’t want to hear the people next to us complaining about the noise when I’m with my little ones at what is classified as a kid-friendly restaurant. You knew what you were getting into. Go somewhere fancy and quiet if the noise level is a bit higher than you are used to.

Or, better yet, shut up and learn to enjoy life by watching the little ones enjoy their meal. What happened to all of us that made us so boring, so uptight that the kids are the only ones at a restaurant who just don’t care and have a good time?

Who made the rule that you have to be quiet and stare off into the distance when dining out? Can’t you just do that at home and save the cash? Or talk only about the weather and parking? Is that really fun?

We can all learn from children about how to have a good time. I know I have.

I used to be one of those people, though, uptight when I had my girls in a restaurant -- no matter how kid-friendly the place claimed to be. I worried, I stressed, I would expect my two little ones to sit with their napkins in their lap. All the while, I’d be glancing around the room to make sure the other dinners were not bothered my children’s horrible manners. My god, one of them dropped their napkin!

What was I thinking?

The kids have it all figured out: if we have to pay $12 for a hamburger then we certainly have the right to jump up and down while we eat it, right? Hand me some fries, bounce, bounce, bounce!! Ketchup flying, water spilling, now that’s a meal.

Try it, really get into that burger. It needs to be all over your face, all over your clothes to be truly enjoyed. It just tastes better that way. 

So, to the guy sitting next to us at the Fairfax burger joint the other night, may I suggest your order to-go next time? Or, just relax a bit and tear into it!

Besides, if the worst my kids ever did was eat without their napkins in their laps, I would be relieved. My most embarrassing moment of the week had nothing to do with nightmare children at a restaurant; it was when my four year old asked a 30-something woman, “Are you a boy or a girl?”  The same day she told an older man at CVS that he looked like Santa but fatter.

Kid-friendly isn’t just at restaurants!

This is not a picture of David and his kids don't pour tea.